Some call Florida “God’s Great Waiting Room”. So why not have fun while you’re waiting for your number to be called? On the edge of Tampa Bay, Florida is a 55 years and older community called “Sun City Center” –   (founded in 1962, current population 19,321 – minus those whose numbers are called).

It’s a beautifully equipped and maintained waiting room featuring golf courses, pools, shuffleboard, tennis, lawnbowling, dancing, wood working, ham radio, arts and crafts . . . and lots of sunshine and smiles. It’s resident population is 98.96% White and drive almost every where in golf carts. It’s where people like Bob and Marge from Toledo, Ohio go when they are ready to drop out of the “rat race” but not the human race.

My vibrant 80 years young Aunt moved there a few years ago and soon after retired from the convent after a very impressive career and life long devotion to human service.

Her invitation to stay with her enabled me to slip in under the 55 and over requirement and sample the “golden life” in Florida’s ultimate waiting room. After all the over stimulation of constant travel and juggling my business on the road, I loved the slow relaxed geriatric vibe of Sun City.

Everyone had time for each other and actually stopped to listen when they asked how you were. All those old men down by the pool calling me “son” made me feel young. I loved it.

But at my young age, I guess I’ll have to keep revving down the fast lane of the “rat race” before I’m ready to lie around the pool soaking up my last rays of sunshine waiting before my number is called.

Next Stop – Tom the International Man of Mystery in Naples Florida

After kayaking and swimming with the giant manatees in the spring fed rivers of Northern Florida, I understand why the Spanish explorers in the 1500′s thought they had found “the fountain of youth”. The crystal clear teal blue water that flows up from the underground caverns in the rivers feed the surrounding wildlife.

“Manatee Spring” on the Gulf coast of Florida spews more than 100 million gallons of clean pure water into the Suwannee River every day. These springs are a comfortable 72 degrees year round. The water then flows 23 more miles downstream into the Gulf of Mexico.

During the winter from November to April the manatees swim up into these springs from the Gulf to enjoy the spring’s life-giving warm waters. The river swamp along the Spring is populated with cypress, gum, ash and maple and other wetland trees.

I tent camped in these woods and rented a Kayak to explore the nearby Chassahowitzka River. This river is known mostly only by the locals and is far less touristy than the well known Manatee Spring Florida State Park.

I paddled up a spring fed river tributary and found a family of three adult manatees and a young calf lurking in deep bay. The adults range from 1,000 to 3,000 pounds and look like giant seals. They are vegetarians and often referred to as “gentle giants”. They surfaced and stuck their noses and face right up along side me and the kayak. They appeared to be as curious about me as I was about them as I petted their noses.

I put on my swimming goggles and dove in with them. Under water they looked more like whales than seals. They moved about slowly and let me come face to face with them. They must have thought I was a strange looking creature with my goggle eyed face.

These springs may not be the fountain of youth. But they felt like the fountain of life. They are part of the “real Florida” that I love.

P.S. Don’t go up river past the confederate flag, especially if you’re a Yankee. It’s serious redneck country and you don’t want to be re-enacting the movie “Deliverance“.

Next Stop – God’s Great Waiting Room – Sun City Center, Florida

Far too much of the old natural Florida has been “developed”, which is a euphemism for commercially exploited. While almost the entire coastline of Florida has been “developed”, they missed a few spots. Thank God.

The remote fishing village of Apalachicola on the gulf coast (Population 2,334) is one of those places. It retains its old Florida charm and continues to be a port for what many consider to be the best oysters in the world. More than 90% of Florida’s oyster production is harvested from Apalachicola Bay. The seafood lunch the RV Bunny and me had was outstanding.

We’d been hopping on down the trail together for over a week and having a great adventure. But it was time for us to take different paths and the RV Bunny needed to return to New Orleans. I took her to Tallahassee where she caught a Greyhound Bus back to Louisiana.

Next Stop – Kayaking Springs – Kayaking and Swimming with the Manatees

When I saw the sign,   I had to pull over and find out just what in the Hell “worm gruntin” was. Apparently in this sleepy weather beaten town called “SopChoppy” it was there big annual event.   A local explained that worm gruntin’ was how they got the worms out of the ground so they could use them for fishing. It involved taking a stick and rubbing it so the vibrations went into the ground and drew the worms up onto the surface.

During the annual Worm Gruntin’ Festival they even crown a king and queen. To learn more about the worm gruntin’ industry and the festival watch the below video.

I would have loved to stay for the Festival but waiting two weeks was two weeks to long, maybe next year.

Next Stop – “Old Florida” – the quaint sleepy seaport of Apalachicola

You haven’t lived until you’ve been to a live crucifixion. Some say it’s better than a barbecue or even a pig roast. As the RV Bunny and me came hopping down the trail, just a few days away from Easter, we turned a corner and there nailed to a cross was some long haired fellow covered in red and looking agonized. A Roman soldier paraded in front of him as three women in black wailed away at the foot of the Jesus impersonator.

This was no typical roadside attraction and the RV Bunny and me pulled over to witness our first live crucifixion. I must say that unlike NASCAR racing or football it’s rather slow paced. After a few minutes of watching we got tired of waiting for Jesus to die and got back on the road.

But yet another surprise drew us off the road yet again when we saw a sign that read “Worm Gruntin’ Festival – April 14th”.

Next Stop – Worm Gruntin’ Festival

Just below Alabama and hugging the lazy Gulf Ocean is a strip of Florida known as the “Pan Handle”. Some call its long stretch of soft white sandy beaches the “Redneck Riviera”.

There’s a saying in Florida that the farther North you go the more South it gets. And Northern Florida is very Southern. As me and the RV Bunny drove across the pan handle and toward Tallahassee, the beach front condos gave way to large tracts of trees dotted with Baptist and Evangelical churches, good old boy fishing holes and streams. Deep in the woods of Northern Florida the best second language to know is speaking in tongues.

Since I don’t speak in tongues I only opened my mouth to enjoy the delicious gulf seafood and fried green tomatoes. With food this delicious no wonder the people are so fat and happy.

As the RV Bunny and I hopped along down the trail, we even stumbled upon a “Live Crucifixion“, complete with a Roman Soldier and wailing women in mourning.

Next Stop – Live Crucifixion